Best Friends Club

[Meowmy]

@ENKELI I am so glad you have a solid,great brother in your life. I am less fortunate. My brother has been made weak nd self centred by dysfunctional upbringing.i am developing some good friends. It takes time. Thank you for pointing out re grow stronger. It is very painful during the process. But it probably is the only way forward. I am fifty four years old. Lived most of life in trauma by inadequate parents. Growing now ha ha

[rav3n]

@Meowmy there's no age limit to growth! great to hear you're developing some new friendships, sounds like an exciting new page 😊

[Meowmy]

@rav3n Thamk you so much for the positive out look and encouragement 

[ENKELI]

@Meowmy I turned 55 in January and I am still learning that the world really isn't all sunshine and roses no matter how hard I've tried to believe that. 

I love my mum but she has always favoured my brother over me. She denies it of course but even my (once) favourite aunt noticed it.

TW: abuse

Content/trigger warning

I think she was overcompensating because dad used to beat the living daylights out of my brother but never laid a hand on me.

Then when I was around 5 my parents split and we moved from Canberra back to the west where mums' family were.

Growing up as a child of divorce in the 70's was uncommon and a lot of my school friends weren't allowed to play with me because of the divorce. Even in high school one of my friends' mums hated me. She liked mum the divorcee, didn't like me though because of the divorce.

TW: abuse

Content/trigger warning

My dad reconnected with me in my mid 20's and from then until I was about 35 dad would email me, send letters or call to abuse me and tell me how worthless I was. He seemed to derive joy from my pain. It wasn't until recently that I found out my stepmonster was behind it all. She had her own f***ed up reasons for hating me and still does.

It's only been in the last 10 years that I have been able to have a relationship with my dad and in that time I've had family and friends replace his distaste of me. My once favourite aunt has publicly commented about how I need to lose weight, how she can't understand why I am "such a lazy slob" and how I should be more grateful as a daughter. One time I was standing near a friend of hers and my cousins' wife (the gym bunny) and my aunt didn't bother to introduce me to her friend. Instead she turned to cousins' wife and introduced her to her friend as "my beautiful daughter in law". The friend smiled and looked at me and my aunt said "oh, she's XXX's daughter, my niece". I tried to smile and then left the room to sit in my car and cry.

Whenever I try to talk to mum about it I got the bog standard "I'm sure she doesn't mean it that way."

Now I avoid all family functions as much as possible. Last year I chose to stay home alone rather than spend Christmas with the family.

And then there is ex best friend. A whole nother story I won't bore you with!

[tyme]

Awww @ENKELI ,

I’m so sorry these things have happened in the past. It sure sounds incredibly difficult to sit with these memories.

Im glad to hear you have found comfort being with friends around you.

Know that you are cared for and loved.

[Meowmy]

@ENKELI hey sweetheart, I can see so much pain there with your biological family and relatives. And lots of trauma. I had similar with my parents. My father was very lowly in character that he calculated to get my qork money and put so much pressure on me to bring in million money for him. I was literally pressured into major MI I was only twenty. After that years went by and I suffered.  But I think now today I found a bit of new direction. If we grow stronger emotionally and mentally, I may be able to come out of my victim role and have fulfilling life ha ha

[Adge]

Thanks @rav3n 😊

Adge

[Adge]

I've never ridden one of those Cool Italian Scooters @Glisten 

Though I have considered it.Honda CB 125FThis is what my Bike looks like @ENKELI - Now, not the one I rode 30 years ago.

Thanks Re: Being Brave.

Yes you are right @Asgard I did have a sore bum, riding Sydney to Brisbane, 30 years ago.

The Bike broke down several times, & refused to start many times on that trip - A bit of a nightmare, really.

You sound stiff & sore after your MRI - I hope you recover okay (I don't like MRIs, I've had several).

Your Cat looks very comfy in that shopping bag....

Adge

[Tilz]

Hey @rav3n  i had the same idea when i read it. later on saw the same on your view. love flying

[ENKELI]

Really nice looking bike @Adge. I have a friend who owned a Honda franchise for 45 years, he told me Hondas are very reliable and of good quality so you picked a winner!

I look forward to hearing about more of your adventures, whether it be a 5 minute trip down the road or a couple of hours in the countryside.

You have inspired me to step out of my comfort circle too. Not learning to ride a bike but to go out and socialise in a public place, something I haven't done in over 18 months.