after some time tonight Ive felt a bit better thanks @MDT I have beeen able to finally talk to a cousin of mine about alot of issues tonight which has helped although I was being very open and honest about how Ive been feeling about a range of issues family wise and online dating wise although in some ways I was quite tight lipped and a bit argumentive or possibly stubborn about doing things my way despite their caring and sensitive talking,listening and advice. Im probly feeling as confused about my situations as the cousin was,cause on the one hand I would like and also need my older cousin to be protective about my well being and safety particually in regards to online dating issues ect but at the same time lately I feel the need to keep all that to myself so I dont know heaps of ongoing emotional conflict between how I behave and feel towards family and how Im talking and behaving while dating. I waana live my own life and its hard to juggle both family and personal dating life, feeling exhausted but with dating at least for now there seems to be a more genuine,down to earth guy who is more about emotional connection,so Im getting there,sometimes an uphill battle but getting there I geuss its a big lot of emotional frustration from different things at the same time
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13 YARN