A long rave

[Appleblossom]

See thats why I have lots of time for you. @outlander 

You catch yourself, and are more mature about what you write than many people twice your age.  We both know that kind of stinking thinking wont fix things. I use the same tough tone too..

I am glad @Mazarita butted in. I was too direct.  Sorry.

Wish you find one day that you do matter. @outlander

Its best to have reduced triggers .. so at least you are aware ....

[Mazarita]

True, @Appleblossom. Driving needs a reason for me. Didn't get my licence until I was 31, and that was so I could do more complicated film-making that involved travelling to different places. Used to be a confident driver. Now I'm very rattled by cars. I think it's also that the meds may have had an affect on my ability to do that particular task.

[outlander]

@Appleblossom youve no need to apologise. I didn't think you were being direct just simply asking a question. Sometimes my brain goes a thousand miles an hr then slams on the breaks
. Stupid thing should think before act 😞

How are you tonight anyways? Any plans for tomorrow?

[outlander]

Oh that is good @Mazarita did you end up at your friends and walking in the nature reserve?
I agree computer is better than phone but ilike the comfort of my bed lol so phone it is!
Is something bothering you tonight that got you worried about sleep?

[Appleblossom]

I got licence at 25 and friend lent me his car so I could drive baby around.  He was one of my mechanical mates so I could talk more like a boy than a girl. lol ... I spent the last 30 years driving mostly rattled, but toughed it out cos of kids. I think cos of all the early bike riding ... I had very tuned senses and triggers.  When I said I could not drive or it was not safe to drive hmmmm.   It was not an option ... no one believed me ... mother, husband or kids ... 

So with all the dissing of mothers ... in my generation we were supposed to operate on freeways at 100 kph with bubbas in the back.  My mother and earlier mothers did not have to deal with stressors like that.  I'd say it rates .. .along with having dinosaurs around as predators ..    now my son finally realises that my neck and stress might actually make a legit difference .. so we never argue over that stuff. It was never his fault.

[Mazarita]

Sorry, @Appleblossom, @outlander, I've been missing posts while drafting my own. Replies might seem out of order. 

Outlander, I did end up at my friend's place, got there about 2pm and stayed until C picked me up on the way home about 5. No nature walk, mainly because my friend's brother was out at the doctor's when I arrived, has been sick and running a high fever. They sent him to the hospital, so the afternoon was kind of taken up with that as my friend was worried about her brother. Nothing particularly bothering me. Just don't want to go to sleep yet. How about you?

Apple, you've done tough miles. I wouldn't diss mothers. I think it's one of the hardest jobs in the world.

[Appleblossom]

@Mazarita  I was not meaning you or this thread (re mother dissing), but it happens often enough on the forum for good reasons as people try and work through major life experiences. 

I also try and see it from the position of motherhood.  Maybe the tek boys will put us out of that job, but not for a while yet,  Its a universal human situation.  

  I started mothering with EVERBODY doing a lot of mother dissing ...

Thanks for just being there and the friendship over the years....

and you are a new friend @outlander Ta Muchly.

[Mazarita]

Ah yes, I see what you mean there too, @Appleblossom. I've certainly done a fair bit of dissing of my own mother over the years. I appreciate her much more now that I'm older. She's an amazing woman.

Thank you for the long friendship too. 

[Appleblossom]

Sorry about your friend's brother. @Mazarita.  It is always difficult, but I am sure it was better with your company.

I am eating dinner atm  ... ossobucco and veg ... hearty. I cooked it but My son dished it up and has gone to play piano, but its musical.

Sometimes he has focussed his anger through playing, but not atm.it is beautiful.  There is not point trying to restrict his timing. It only causes him stress.

Its been hard, I dont think I would still be here without the forum. thats @eth @PeppiPatty @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope  and lots more.

Most of the time these days I sleep nights. I will get my meds.

[Mazarita]

@Appleblossom, beautiful that you are hearing lovely music from your son. Your ossobucco sounds yum. 

I may be drifting in to the one all nighter, one day down kind of rhythm with my sleep again, now that I'm no longer taking the med that had me almost completely knocked out for some weeks. Even being able to do what I did today is some measure of improvement, glad of it.